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Tuesday, July 21, 2009

Blogger Down! Help! I've Fallen And I Can't Get Up!

Is this a right-wing conspiracy? Only you can decide. Sonia, Hillary, Me. Coincidence? I think not.

Here's the basic really bad idea: (1) cheap plastic flip-flop shoes with a slick bottom; (2) wet lawn; (3) steep slope towards the back; (4) me climbing up the slope to feed the birds and squirrels; (5) shoe bottom hits the wet patch, I go into free-fall, do my downhill racer impersonation, ankle snaps with a loud cracking sound, several bones broken, I am down.

So is the sad tale of this blogger, felled by a good deed.
I thought about saying I was skateboarding in a friend's swimming pool and came down hard, or dove off a cliff into a lake and hit something on the way down, or broke it in my kick-boxing competition, or cracked up my car on the racetrack, or fell off my horse in an equestrian event, or landed wrong when I was skydiving, or took a header out of the hot-air balloon when it sprung a leak. But the pathetic truth is I was just filling the bird feeder. Not yet an olympic event, but maybe one of these days. I hope my loud whining doesn't disturb everyone.
Thankfully my obnoxious (is there any other kind?) orthopedic with a crappy bedside manner will operate, put in duct tape, chewing gum and bailing wire, all held together with a few screws, and I will once again be functional although hampered by crutches for the rest of the summer.

Regular blogging operations should resume by Monday the 27th.

2 comments:

  1. Ouch!

    After a sympathetic twinge, my next reaction was...

    NAB feeds squirrels! Only in New York!

    Everywhere else, chasing those incredibly agile and persistent little mammals off the feeder is what makes bird-feeding a sport.

    And now for the good advice!

    You will be tempted to hop around the house without bothering with crutches every time you want a glass of water, or whatever.

    Do not do it! Catastrophic possibilities lurk everywhere! Relax, take a little extra time, be extra careful, and watch this...

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ARHyRI9_NB4

    It's the great terranaomi, who came out of nowhere with nothing but a webcam and... genius.

    J.F.

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